Get ready for a reality check with these 28 harsh realities everyone needs to hear. We’re not afraid to tell it like it is, so brace yourself for some hard truths.
Recently someone asked online, “What’s a harsh reality that everybody needs to hear?” There were thousands of responses. Here are some of the top-voted answers.
It’s the Parents
“Children’s first bullies are often their parents” was the top-voted response.
Another added, “Absolutely. Also, I know it’s cliché, but a lot of bully school kids really do learn it from home.”
As a parent, it is important to remember to treat your kids how you want to be treated.
Life Can Change in a Minute
michaeljung via DepositPhotos.com.
“Your life can be changed forever in the blink of an eye. You have to deal with it or die. I’m 62, I went to run errands one day with my beautiful wife of 42 years, and I came home 2 hrs later a widower. She died of a massive heart attack in the passenger seat. That was about 13 months ago, it’s been hard, but I’m still here thanks to some wonderful people in my life,” someone wrote.
A sobering thought.
Most People Shouldn’t Be on Social Media
“Most people should not be on social media of any kind because they cannot handle what it does to them mentally. It is not about socialization it’s about corporations monetizing your life,” someone wrote.
We all need to cut down on our social media consumption.
It Won’t Just Happen
“I spent a lot of my early 20s being sad and defeatist, feeling sorry for myself. I always coped with this by telling myself that I’d make something of myself eventually, and meet a woman eventually, and be happy eventually. The truth is, eventually doesn’t come if you don’t make it come. Improvement has to be proactive. You CAN end up 40 years old, living with your parents, playing video games all day, and with no motivation. Nothing will prevent that from happening other than you,” someone wrote.
Another replied, “Thanks. I’ve stagnated and needed to hear this.”
Don’t Say It
logoff via DepositPhotos.com.
“Whatever you say can and will be used against you,” someone wrote.
Someone responded, “Yep. Even DAs will tell you “don’t say s***. Just don’t. There is absolutely nothing you can say that will help you. If a cop wants to arrest you and charge you they will. If they don’t, talking will give them a reason to.”
Physical Appearance Matters
chaoss via DepositPhotos.com.
“Physical appearance matters. Almost everyone is shallow, and if you are ugly, people might treat you as inferior and you will have disadvantages in almost every aspect of life (i.e, pretty privilege or Halo effect, look that up) (As an ugly person, I confirm)” someone shared.
A harsh reality indeed!
Some People Will Hurt You
“Some people will hurt you, and they won’t care how you feel about it,” someone wrote.
Someone shared a sad story, “Yeah. I learned this through an excruciating experience with my now ex-husband. Even now, years later, I still can’t wrap my head around how he went from love to literally not caring if I live or die. Waking up every day during that period, I’d be ok for a split second and then the reality of what was happening would hit me. I guess I was naïve but I couldn’t accept that he really didn’t give a f***”
Walk Your Dogs
This comment got an award! “You gotta walk your dogs,” they wrote.
Someone added, “I heard someone put it this way which really hit home: “to you, it may feel like a chore, but to your dog it’s probably their favorite part of the day.”
If you don’t think you’ll be able to care for a dog, don’t get one.
You Will Fail
“Failure is part of life,” one person wrote.
Everyone fails. It is just a fact of life. No one is perfect.
They Won’t Do the Same for You
“Just because you go out of your way for people, it doesn’t mean they will do the same for you,” someone wrote.
He later added to the comment, “All I’m saying is, be careful who you drop everything for.”
Bad Things Happen To Good People
“Life is not automatically easier just because you’re a good person,” one person wrote.
In fact, this is one of the biggest questions of all time: why do bad things happen to good people? We don’t know, but it’s true.
Love Won’t Always Come Back
“You can love someone with all of your heart and not be loved back in the same way,” someone wrote.
Another shared, “I wasted a lot of time in my life either being too stupid to learn this or, at the very least, too stubborn to admit it to myself.”
Not Everyone Likes You
“Not everyone likes you,” someone wrote.
Antoehre expounded, “Some people won’t like you for very arbitrary reasons or for no reason at all. It takes way too much of your energy trying to make people like you. Use that energy on yourself and your loved ones. It’s a life lesson I learned much later than I could have.”
Things Happen
“It’s a Star Trek reference, but it’s a very realistic one. “It is possible to make no mistake and still lose. That is not a weakness, that is life”. Sometimes you need to accept you did everything within your power right, and it still went bad. And remember that this isn’t something to beat yourself up over. These things happen,” someone wrote.
The Good Times Are Now
“You don’t realize the good/best times as they are happening,” someone wrote.
Someone wrote, “Sometimes when my husband and I find ourselves in a particularly happy and loving moment with our toddler, I’ll tell him to focus on this moment, record it in your memory because these are the good ol days.”
You Can Become Disabled
“You can become disabled unexpectedly at any point in your life. Make sure you’re taking advantage of the abilities you have while you have them,” someone wrote.
That is a great point!
Be Careful
“This comment should rise like cream to the top. Seriously, the human body is amazing, resilient, and beautifully intricate. It is also fragile, complicated, and fallible. Never, ever ride in a car with your feet on the dash. Don’t light those M80s in your hand. Don’t dive headfirst into unfamiliar waters. Life is already trying to kill or maim you, don’t give it any help. Signed, someone that has witnessed a handful of level 1 traumas and studying to become a surgical scrub,” someone wrote.
This is such great advice! be careful. You only have one life.
Sometimes You’re the Bad Guy
“Sometimes you’re the bad guy,” someone wrote.
Another person expounded, ” This one, and I think it has a sister: Just because you’re pissed off, doesn’t mean it’s someone else’s fault. Sometimes you’re just being an unreasonable *****. Don’t sweat it; it happens to all of us. But if you keep telling the story where the other person is the bad guy, you probably never learn a lesson and stop acting like an unreasonable f****.”
Nobody Is Coming
“Nobody is coming to save you. You have to do it yourself,” someone shared.
Be the Person
“Be the person you needed while you were growing up,” someone added.
Another person commented, “I love this because it provides the right direction for personal growth. I hate this because it means I will never reap what I will sow and shall never sit under the shade of the tree I plant.”
Family Doesn’t Always Have Your Back
Your family could be everything but it doesn’t mean it always is.
Someone wrote, “Just because someone is your family doesn’t mean they have your best interests at heart.”
You Can’t Treat People Badly
Someone wrote, “Depression, an illness, a bad upbringing and many more: These are not excuses to treat people badly. If someone is nice to you then these are not excuses to treat them like s**. And if you do, they are not required to forgive you. No one is required to give you a second chance.”
Another added, “Your mental health is not your fault but it is your responsibility.
Happiness Is Now
Someone shared a harsh reality and excellent advice for life, “I thought I’d be happy when I graduated college, or when I got my first apartment, or when I bought my first home. Don’t expect happiness to be at the finish line. Happiness comes from yourself in the now. Enjoy the process.”
Nobody Cares
“Nobody cares! So just go for it; everyone’s busy with themselves to pay too much attention to what you are doing,” someone shared.
“Facts, a teacher in high school taught me “at the end of the day, nobody cares about you, nobody is going to bed at night thinking of your problems” And it always stuck with me,” someone added.
Don’t Quit Your Day Job
“The probability of you “making it” as a professional gamer/streamer/YouTuber isn’t worth quitting your job. You have a higher chance of getting hit by a car or winning a million dollar lottery. (Not saying give up. But be realistic. Keep a job that’ll pay the bills while you try).” someone wrote.
Another added, “Don’t quit your day job until your internet career is already paying your bills. In addition to the odds being stacked against you, you don’t even know if you can keep up “content production” without dipping your toes in it in a way that keeps your real job.”
You Are Responsible
Someone wrote, “Your Trauma is not your fault, but it is your responsibility.”
Someone added, “This is a great one. I see a lot of people with parental issues struggle with this. I went to therapy and was diagnosed with PTSD from the way I was raised. The main thing my therapist told me was that it was 100% not my fault, BUT I am the one responsible for dealing with the fallout. It isn’t fair, but it’s the reality.”
You Don’t Have as Many People as You Think
This one is a really harsh reality.
“You don’t have as many friends or family as you think. I have a chronic illness, and the number of people who bailed on me during my hardest times only to pop up, surprised I was upset with them once I started healing, is truly disgusting. You’ve got a core few. Nurture those relationships like your life depends on it. Mine does,” someone wrote.
Life Is Not Fair
Let’s end with one that we hear often but is hard to internalize.
“Life is not fair. Expecting it to be will always disappoint you. People will get special treatment for all kinds of things. It will never change,” someone wrote.
This is true.
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This post originally appeared on A Dime Saved.
A Dime Saved
Hi! I am a millennial mom with a passion for personal finance. I have always been “into” personal finance but got inspired to start my blog after a period of extended unemployment. That experience really changed the way I viewed my relationship with money and the importance of accessible personal finance education.