Maximizing Bonuses

Using Big Money to get you Financial Freedom

Best Way to Use your Holiday Bonus

What are you doing with your holiday bonus?

Many people get a large or small bonus around this time of year. Its super tempting to go and spend it all on something fun or even something you think you “need”. Especially when its a performance-based bonus its easy to convince yourself that you “deserve” to spend all of it on something really fun or frivolous.

But, you know what you really deserve? The biggest gift you can give yourself and your family?

Financial freedom and security.

Plan Ahead for Maximum Responsibility

BEFORE you get a bonus or other large amounts of “extra money” is the best time to decide where it should go to make the most meaningful impact on your finances. Large amounts can make the biggest dents in any debt or savings goal and has the added bonus (get it?) of making you feel like your making real progress. Small amounts DO add up but its much harder to see the progress.

Are you one of the lucky few to get a holiday bonus this year? Fingers crossed that I get one this year!

So… what to do with that extra cash?

Here is what I suggest:

If you have a lot of debt then the best thing to do is to put it towards that. Large amounts can really move the needle on your debt repayment plan and will lower your overall interest paid pretty significantly. Put it all towards one of your bills. You can put it towards the debt with the highest-interest rate or you can follow the Snowball Plan and put towards the smallest debt you have. But whichever debt you decided to pay off- put it there! Even if you are not in a strict paying off debt mode- paying off debt is one of the best ways to free up money and reach financial security and freedom.

If you don’t have any debt (good for you!) then you have some options (isn’t it great to have choices!?)

  1. First of all, take off 10% and put it towards charity. I always make charity a priority in my life. I have a few organizations that I like to give too and I also give to individuals who I personally know are struggling.
  2. Take 15% and put it in your savings ladder.

Now this is where the choices and decisions begin:

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My $12 Vanity Trip and How I Bought Myself a Kid’s Toy

This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosures for more info.

The struggle of raising kids with a balanced approach to money and materialism

So vacation was pretty awesome!

We got to our Airbnb and after we set down our stuff we headed straight to the beach. We had brought some sand stuff for our kids to play with but as soon as we got there we noticed that the beach was crowded with families and most of the kids in the water had various inner tubes to play with in the water. We hadn’t brought anything for the to play with IN the water- just for outside the water. My son, pointing to a bright purple inner tube, asked “What is that kid playing with?” We responded that it’s a fun thing to float with in the water. My other son, “We don’t have anything to play with in the water”. I looked at my husband and my heart sank. I saw on his face that he was thinking the same thing. We felt so bad that our kids were in the water with all these other kids who were having so much fun with their floating toys. We put a bright face on and played in the water and on the beach- we don’t need stuff to have fun!!

Beach trip

The next day we hung out in the pool and then decided to head to the beach again. After a hurried consultation with DH, we decided to try to find a store to buy the kids inner tubes so there wouldn’t be a repeat of the previous day. If the tubes were affordable, say under $20, we would buy one so our kids wouldn’t have to stare longingly at other kid’s toys the whole day. We both grew up in large families and there wasn’t money for “extras”. So many times in my childhood I had gone without those small extras and I was determined that for this vacation at least my kids would have even this small thing.

We live frugally because we have to, and because we consider saving for our future and staying away from any debt to be a priority and there are many times I feel so bad for my kids. We don’t do so many things that other people do and even though they are still young, I wonder if they ever feel the pinch and feel badly or even resent us for that.

We didn’t want to spend any more money on this vacation than we had to but we decided to buy these tubes or some sort of floaty toy. On the way to the beach we stopped at a small store and I jumped out without telling my kids what I was getting. I ran inside and saw these fun inner tubes with a unicorn head attached for only $6. I immediately grabbed 2! Not only would my kids have the fun toys but they wouldn’t even need to share! I good barely contain my excitement as I paid and headed back to the car. The kids would be so psyched especially as I hadn’t indicated that I would buy them anything.

I reached the car and casually handed them each the box, “I bought you each something”, I said and grinned at my husband. We stared at them excitedly as they looked at it. Their response was… well, underwhelming to say the least. “What is it?” “It’s a floaty!” I said, “You know like all the kids had yesterday!”. “Oh” they said, “For, us?” “Yes!!!” we practically screamed “We bought these for you so when we go in the water today”. “But did we bring the sand toys?” “Both! You get to play with both!”. There excitement was palpable… not. As soon as we blow them up, we reasoned, they will realize what they are and they will get super excited. It’s hard to see what they are when they are still in a box, and the kids are still so young they can’t visualize it. Suffice it say, the excitement level just got lower as we blew them up. One kid flat out refused to carry it to the water from the car, “I don’t want to play with it”. The other brought it to the water and promptly left it next to the towels. We convinced him to play with it for a total of 30 seconds. AS we realized that they were supremely uninterested, I began to look at the whole incident with different eyes. Maybe the trip to the beach hadn’t gone as I thought it had?

Could it be that it wasn’t the kids who were jealous of the other kids, but me?

Was I projecting my disappointment on my children?

Was it possible that I was the one giving longing looks at the fun of the inner tubes, not them?

Was it possible that the “game face” I had put on was totally and completely unnecessary and my kids were enjoying themselves perfectly fine?

Was I regressing to my childhood and it was really child me who wanted an inner tube and couldn’t have one? Was I buying the inner tube to baby me who wanted what she couldn’t have?

Was I projecting my own insecurities about what I can and cannot buy and give to my children to things that I assumed that they wanted as opposed to things that they actually wanted?

Is it possible that maybe my kids don’t feel as deprived as I think they do? Click To Tweet

Maybe I should have actually spoken to my kids and found out what they wanted instead of trying to play mother of year to them?

Did I actually go and spend money to make myself feel like a “fun” mother instead of finding out if my kids wanted inner tubes? If I wanted to treat them, maybe they would have wanted something else?

The money I spent wasn’t really the point, thankfully it was only $12 and although it’s not returnable I’m sure that we will eventually get some use out of them (maybe next year!) but it really got me thinking about the things I buy for my kids and why I buy them. There are some things that I buy because they need them but maybe there are some things I buy because I think they “need” them but they actually don’t? Maybe sometimes I buy things for them to feel like a “good mother” or because I am projecting my own insecurities onto my own kids without addressing their actual insecurities and needs?

I’m not sure exactly what the answer to all these questions are. These are questions that I am assuming most parents grapple with as we want to give our kids the world, not spoil them, well maybe a little, but not enough to ruin them. We want them to have everything but also work for it, feel loved and taken care of but also not be entitled. It’s a tall order!

What are some of the issues you face when buying things for your kids? Am I the only one who feels this way? Tell me I’m not alone!