A Reddit user shared her story and worried about telling her boyfriend she had had cosmetic procedures.
The OP has done fillers in her temple and a little on the lips to make them more plump. According to her, she did this out of pure vanity. She had struggled with being underweight for a long time. Due to health complications and depression that took two years, the OP’s face permanently lost volume in crucial places.
She Couldn’t Recognize Herself in the Mirror
When she regained her weight and started looking healthier, she still did not get ‘meat’ to her cheekbones. As a result, her face looked sunken and sick. Her lips and temple lost a lot of volume, and she could not recognize herself in the mirror.
She felt insecure, old, and tired. A plastic surgeon suggested fillers in her temple and a little in her lips to restore plumpness. She agreed to the procedure.
She met her boyfriend eight months after this procedure, and everything has been going on well. The problem is that she is due for another refill, and she wonders whether she should tell her boyfriend about it or not.
The Masses Weigh In
The users were supportive of the OP, with many telling her it would be better if she came out clean to her boyfriend.
Better sooner than later, said one user, “I think this is just the kind of thing that comes up when you’re getting to know someone on a deeper level, and it’s a good idea to tell him.”
Tell Him Now
Another supported this sentiment, “It is tricky. I can tell you really like being in this relationship and don’t want him to get the wrong idea about your fillers. You should tell him exactly like you told us!”
One user told her that if she didn’t want to keep this secret forever, she should come clean now, “I’m a woman, but I think you should tell him just for your own peace of mind. What if you’re together forever? Do you want to have to keep this silly little secret forever because you were too nervous to bring it up early on?”
If He’s a Good Man It Won’t Matter
A man chipped in to say that she should tell him as he won’t be fazed by it, “This sort of thing isn’t a big deal to a good man – even a halfway decent man. If something like a little fillers bothers him, then he’s not halfway decent.”
Another agreed, saying, “Most guys will be cool as long as it makes you happy and you are not fixed on it or expect them to always comment on it. My wife had a boob job after kids because she hated the sagging boobs. I insisted it wasn’t an issue but she wanted it, and it’s her body and her money (ours anyway). I was more shocked how expensive it was. But it made her happy, so I didn’t mind.”
Honesty Is Key to Any Relationship
A user advised her to be honest, “Honesty is important. I’ve just heard different perspectives about this, and it has made me unsure what to do. Some say a woman should keep a bit of mystery and not give it all away. Others say it’s your own body and choice, and therefore, he doesn’t have the right to know. And others use your opinion. Makes me a bit confused.”
How She Approaches the Subject Is Critical
How she approached this topic was critical, advised another user, “I don’t think this is something that should be told like “Honey we need to talk, I’ve had plastic surgery,” I think it’s more of a small side note when talking about your previous weight issues and mental health crises. “I had an ED and lost a lot of weight; because of that, my face lost a lot of dimension and as a result, I get Botox every once in a while, so I look more like myself.” I think there is a huge difference between a cosmetic procedure for vanity and a procedure that gives you your confidence back after a stint with mental/physical illness.”
He Should Know the Risks Involved
According to one user, the partner should know so that if there are any risks involved, he can be supportive, “I feel like a partner should know if you are having a procedure done because of the risks. Imagine something as simple as swelling, and you suddenly need to explain to your partner why you look like someone punched you in the head. Even worse, if something goes catastrophically wrong and you need to stay in hospital, and your partner first can’t reach you and then learns from someone else what happened. Pretty sure that would be a lot worse than talking to him before the procedure happens so that he knows what’s going on”
Will Help You To Understand Your Partner on a Deeper Level
A user pointed out that they would like to know so that they can understand the OP’s challenges on a deeper level, “I would appreciate knowing about such things. Not because I care about fillers or plastic surgery (it’s not like I’m not waiting for one myself, I would always tell that before dating because it’s something very big and necessary). But because I would like to know about the difficulties, the experiences, etc. of the person I am with. That’s the only way I can fully support my partner. After all, it is one of the most important people in my life.”
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This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.
