A woman posted on Mumsnet, wanting to know whether she was being unreasonable for refusing to commit her child’s attendance to a birthday party that was three months later.
The Earlier, the Better for Everyone
The OP (original poster) says she has received messages in her child’s diary asking her to confirm her child’s attendance for birthday parties that were to happen three months later.
Now, she acknowledges that she is all for planning early but does not understand why she should start committing to a party that was still that “far ahead.”
Three Months Is a Long Time
She acknowledges that planning would help organize the party well but insists three months is a long time to start tying yourself down.
She goes ahead and explains how much they never plan family events. For instance, she says she will have her mother-in-law over after Easter, but they have not set the exact dates. She wants to leave everything open.
Spontaneity Pays off Sometimes
OP says organizing things that far in advance often ends up with no chance to accommodate things that come up on the way. For instance, if you plan a party three months ahead, what happens if someone ends up in the hospital?
Organizing things in advance, for instance, getting a venue or tickets earlier, is always cheaper. Besides, things often sell out, so you must get them beforehand.
The Pros and Cons of Planning Ahead
For a birthday, you must get your baker or decor person before they are fully booked. Knowing the number of people you will have in advance will help you give the correct precisions to such service providers.
This setting also lets the parents prepare food, venue size, and activities.
Spontaneity Is Fun
However, on the other hand, some of the most fun things I have done were spontaneous. The most memorable trips I had had me planning and booking everything the same day before I left. When OP says she likes to leave everything open and accommodate changes in how they come, I understand her.
However, she insists that she finds planning for events that way ahead annoying.
Is she being unreasonable for not accepting to commit to her child’s attendance at a birthday party that was way ahead?
The Masses Weigh In
Let’s now look at what the mums had to say. One commenter said, “Well, you’d hate me then. I am about to book my child’s birthday party for the last week in July.I appreciate people letting me know if they can come so I can plan food etc. Conversely, I would get these dates in the diary in advance too. It helps me plan holidays etc.”
3 Months Is Not Long
Another chimed in, “3 months is not long at all. Especially if places get booked up, especially for a birthday that the person knows will happen yearly.Sounds like you need to be a bit more forward-thinking with plans as you’re now arranging the diaries of your children too, not just yourself and family.”
Can a Late RSVP Work?
Another commented, “Do you have an RSVP date on the invites? I would call the parents and ask if they might accept a late RSVP from some people. Or you could decline the party invite or work around it if your child wants to go?”
And lastly, “I tell people I’ll let them know nearer the time, and if kids’ parties are taking over entire weekends, which sometimes happens, I refuse one of them.”
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This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.