OP (original poster) did not want a gender reveal party, but her husband’s family made a big deal out of it, so she agreed to do it. But that was not the only thing she was going to deal with. Her mother-in-law was on her back the whole time, and OP decided to give anything to free herself; it did not end well for them.
Just Tell Me…
OP’s mother-in-law insisted that OP knew the baby’s gender and kept pushing to be told.
OP says that she didn’t know the baby’s gender, but the MIL won’t take it. She kept sending texts begging to be told and promising not to tell anyone.
To get her MIL off her back, OP decided to tell her she was having a girl. She figured it was a 50/50 chance after all.
Gender reveal party day came, and everyone was having fun until it was time for cake cutting. The first cut revealed a blue color, which was followed by awkward silence. MIL had told people on her side of the family the gender of the baby so that they could bring appropriate gifts.
OP’s family and friends quickly gathered around her to congratulate her on her son, but the MIL’s family was still in confusion.
I Didn’t Promise Anything
Later in the party, the MIL walked to OP and “hissed” at OP for making her look stupid. OP reminded her that she promised not to tell anyone. MIL said she did not promise anything, so OP took out the text conversation and showed her.
MIL’s family was there when OP took the text conversation out, and they all admitted that she lied and never intended to keep the promise in the first place. OP even reminded her that she had told her on multiple occasions that she did not know the gender of the baby yet.
You Are Trying To Embarrass Me
MIL insists that OP only did it to embarrass her.
Now OP’s husband wants OP to apologize to keep the peace. OP says she will probably apologize, but she still does not think she is an ***hole for what she did.
What do you think?
The Masses Weigh In
Is OP the ***hole for “lying” to her mother-in-law?
Here is what some Reddit users had to say.
“NTA. she embarrassed herself. “I’m sorry you embarrassed yourself by lying” is the only apology I’d be willing to give.” Said the top comment on the post.
Another comment said, “I hate conflict and usually just apologize to keep the peace, but it’s a long-term bad strategy. It sets a precedent where the MiL (and all those like her) can steamroll her way through every event safely in the knowledge she won’t be called out on it.”
OP agreed to apologize to keep the peace, even if she knew her MIL was wrong. But this is a behavior her MIL needs to be called out of, or she will keep doing it to OP and other people around her.
Who will be the one to call MIL out for this now that her son obviously won’t be doing it? OP may have to do it, or she’ll have to deal with it repeatedly.
And lastly, “Honestly, I don’t even think OP should give that apology. OP’s husband was sloppy in maintaining boundaries with his mom and now wants to protect his mom from the consequences of her own actions. If anything, OP’s husband and his mom should be apologizing to her.”
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This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.