The original poster (OP) went behind her husbandâs back and asked her friend to come to what was supposed to be a family vacation. Her husband disapproved of this decision, but OP still thinks he is being childish.
What do you think about inviting third parties to family vacations?
Family Vacation or Girlsâ Trip?
OP is a 30-year-old woman who is married to a 32-year-old man. She has two children, aged 9 and 12, from her previous marriage. She says her husband has been a great stepfather to these children.
Now, OPâs husband works a lot, so they decided to organize a family vacation where he would finally get away from his demanding job.
Their 12-year-old would be attending a week-long summer camp, so they decided to go with the nine-year-old to San Francisco.
OP then asked one of her close friends if she wanted to go on vacation with them, which she eagerly accepted.
The first issue here is that OPâs husband hates the friend OP had just invited. He dislikes her lifestyle and how wild she can get at parties and events.
I Would Rather Stay at Home
When she broke the news to her husband, he could not believe what OP had done. He even asked if OP was considering doing it or if she had already invited her.
Unfortunately, OPâs friend had already been invited, and she had said she was âdefinitelyâ coming.
He expressed how hurt he was because OP was making unilateral decisions. He insists that the friendâs presence would change the vacationâs vibe, and he would rather stay home if she were going.
OP tried explaining that her friend understood what kind of vacation that was. But her husband insists that her making such decisions without involving him makes OP an ***hole.
Was she wrong to go behind her husbandâs back and invite her friend?
The Masses Weigh In
The commenters were in unison that OP was the ***hole in the situation. What is even more baffling is that the invited friend is not even a family friend; it is a friend she knows her husband cannot stand. That is a sure way to ruin his vacation.
One commenter said, âYTA. Why would you think inviting a friend on a family vacation is OK without even talking to your husband? Do you even understand what a marriage partnership means? I bet youâd flip if he did the same thing and invited one of his friends. The fact that you invited someone you know he dislikes shows just how little you care about your husband.â
Another commenter had an idea of why OP invited her party-loving friend, âShe does care if heâs there. This is a girlâs trip, but the husband has a role too. Who else will watch the kid when sheâs out with her friend.â
Do you think OP was tagging her husband as a sitter?
More comments could not understand why one child was at a camp and another was going on a week-long vacation, yet OP still termed it a family vacation, âYTA. Also, how does the older child feel about being left out of a family vacation, especially if their camp is only one week for the whole summer? I donât think you know what the term family vacation is.â
And lastly, âYTA. Trips cost money. Theyâre not cheap. Heâs taking his vacation time off to spend it with you and the family, yet youâre trying to force him to spend it with a woman he doesnât get along with well? But beyond that, you didnât even consult him about this idea; you just did it without talking to him. I donât blame him. I wouldnât go. Iâd prefer having that week to myself, away from all of you, to do what I want. You sound exhausting.â
Many other comments advised OP to disinvite her friend and organize a separate girlsâ trip if she needed a vacation with her friend. Is this the right way for her? Does her husband deserve an apology?
This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.
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