A Reddit user posted a story about how his father-in-law belittled him for cooking saying it was women’s work and complained when he made the effort.
Father-in-Law Thinks Cooking Is Women’s Work
The OP stated that his FIL belittled him several times for cooking, saying it was women’s work. OP’s wife told him to brush it off as his father was ‘old school.’ OP owns a restaurant, and although he is not a chef, he says he is a good cook.
When his in-laws had a big reunion last summer, he brought a lot of good cheap food to feed a lot of people.
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When his parents came to visit, he invited his in-laws because it had been a while since they all got together. He cooked a very fancy meal for this occasion.
His FIL was quick to point out that he never cooked like that for them. The OP reiterated that it was because the FIL told him cooking was for women, and he did not want to appear feminist. The FIL was offended by that, and he said the OP had belittled him by only cooking like that for his family.
After they left, OP’s wife supported her father, saying the OP should have ordered out or cooked a simple meal instead of making her father feel he was not worth OP’s efforts.
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The OP wanted to know if he did wrong by not cooking fancy food for his FIL, who showed no appreciation.
The Masses Weigh In
The Reddit Community was quick to back OP’s action. One user cited that the OP didn’t need to make good food for an ungrateful person, “Why would you make a great meal for someone so ungrateful.”
The Wife Should Have Supported the Op
Other users noted that OP’s wife allowed her father to belittle him when she should have done something about it. One user said, “Honestly wife is more the problem than FIL. No matter what … her dad slops about, she’s telling OP to humor him, ignore the verbal jabs and also make FIL feel honored.”
Another user added, “Your wife is wrong. Instead of requiring her father to show respect; she would rather let him insult you. Why would you cook a fancy dinner for someone who belittles your profession?”
FIL Did Not Appreciate What It Takes To Cook a Good Meal
One user noted that if the FIL did not appreciate what it took for the OP to prepare a good meal, he had no right to request one, “If he can’t appreciate and value the effort that goes into it, he doesn’t deserve the fancy meal.”
Another noted that the FIL did not respect the OP and hence he didn’t deserve OP’s cooking efforts, “I noticed you already established the boundary of not cooking for them when they come, and I think that’s the right approach, why would you break your back cooking ridiculous meals for someone who doesn’t respect you.”
The FIL Should Have Visited OP’s Restaurant
A user argued that the FIL should have known that the OP was a good cook because he owned a restaurant and cooked for a living.
The user said, “That they didn’t know you could cook? Have they never eaten at your restaurant? Do they know you cook for a living? Cooking for your in-laws is totally optional. So you can cook whatever you want.”
“Well, didn’t you say you have a restaurant? The said FIL should have visited it at least once, right? If he did, he’d know how good your cooking was. If he didn’t, and he’s just finding out how good it is, it is entirely his fault,” quipped another user.
The FIL Should Apologize to the OP
One user said that the FIL should consider apologizing to the OP if he needed his help, “If he apologies sincerely for his derogatory sexist comments, maybe you’ll consider teaching him how to cook…”
Do you think the OP did the right thing by letting his father-in-law know that he did not cook as well as expected because, according to him (FIL), cooking was a woman’s job? Would you have done it differently if you were in OP’s position?
Read the original post here.
This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.