Is He Wrong for Criticizing His ‘Poor’ Friend’s Spending Habits When He Grew up Privileged

A Reddit user shares his story of being critical of his poor friend’s spending habits.

Making Ends Meet

The original poster (OP) explained that he and his friend have been buddies since middle school. OP said that he grew up very privileged while his friend grew up poor.

There was never any conflict between them when they were kids, they did mostly no-cost activities together, or OP’s parents gave him money for their outings.

OP’s friend became a dealer in high school to help put him through college. Years later, he still makes below minimum wage as a dealer. He spends a lot of money on gas and must constantly repair his cars because of his reckless driving. OP has suggested that he apply for jobs elsewhere, but he doesn’t seem interested.

He continuously brags that he has connections in Hollywood and will make it big when they graduate. Since he lives at home and attends community college, he has enough extra money that he’s got four cars, a lot of shoes, and a bunch of other things that OP sees as “useless.”

For his 24th birthday, OP’s friend rented a fancy hotel room for $500 a night, and he goes out to expensive restaurants weekly.

On the downside, he’s always struggling to pay off his credit cards and is almost always in debt to people. OP said he would think his friend was trying to impress people, but OP is the richest out of all their friends, and his friend spends more than all of them combined.

Reckless Spending

Last week, OP said that his friend was telling him again that he would make it in Hollywood, and OP suggested he make a backup plan in case things don’t work out. He got defensive and claimed he has “tons” of industry connections and has worked hard to get them. OP asked whether he has considered selling some of his cars to save money.

He got upset and said that he already owns four of his six dream cars and that very few people can say that. He also claims that the cars plus the mods cost “way more” than the car OP’s parents bought for him.

They started arguing about the best way to take care of finances. OP told him that he can’t rely on his dreams of making it big in Hollywood.

He got even more upset and said that OP doesn’t get it because he’s never had to take care of himself, and OP countered by saying his friend has no idea how to manage his money and he would have fewer problems if he learned how to save money. His friend isn’t speaking to him now even though they’ve never had an issue they couldn’t resolve before.

Was OP wrong for advising his friend on organizing his finances? Should OP’s friend have been more receptive to OP’s advice? How would you have reacted in this situation?

This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.

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Hi! I am a millennial mom with a passion for personal finance. I have always been “into” personal finance but got inspired to start my blog after a period of extended unemployment. That experience really changed the way I viewed my relationship with money and the importance of accessible personal finance education.