The original poster (OP), a 26-years old man, posted in the AITA subreddit, seeking opinions on whether he was wrong for yelling at his girlfriend, 24 years old, who kept dipping her fingers in cake mixtures that were not hers.
OP’s sister runs a bakery business. She had been struggling to keep up with orders since she was short-staffed, yet she had been getting many wedding cake orders.
To help his sister, OP offered to make cake fillings at his home and deliver them to the business. This way, his sister would have less work.
The last four times OP made the fillings, his 24-year-old girlfriend would dip her fingers in the jars, contaminating the filling. Whenever OP questioned this behavior, she would say she “just wanted to try some.”
OP tried explaining that she could not just dip her fingers into the filling as she would contaminate the entire batch, forcing him to remake it.
He even told her to use a spoon to scoop some if she really wanted to try. She, however, never welcomed OP’s suggestion. She insisted that using her fingers took her back to her childhood, and she loved it.
Are You Fat Shaming Me?
The fifth time was the last straw for OP. He had made chocolate custard ready to be sent to his sister. This was for a wedding cake that was running late, so things needed to be done fast.
OP gently warned his girlfriend not to eat the filling; if she wanted to, she should use a spoon. He then dashed to the shower.
He gets out of the shower, and surprise…she has her fingers in the filling! OP lost it because that was the fifth time she was doing it. OP yelled at her to stop **** eating the filling because it was not hers and she was contaminating it.
She disregarded the rest of the statement that said she was contaminating the filling, which was not hers in the first place. She decided to run with only, “stop **** eating.”
The girlfriend has been crying, saying OP fat-shamed her. He did not comment on her weight; she has no history of eating disorders or weight issues. OP acknowledges that he was harsh on her, but she kept pushing the limits.
Was he wrong for this?
Redditors Weigh In
One comment said, “Does she also wear a diaper and draw on the walls with crayons because it reminds her of her childhood? NTA (You are not the ***hole).
Many comments could not understand why an adult would not use a spoon, especially on food that was not theirs.
However, what had me thinking were the comments that questioned the relationship between OP’s girlfriend and his sister. For instance, one said, “NTA. She’s exhausting and sounds like she’s trying to sabotage you from helping your sister.”
And lastly, a comment taking a deep dive into OP’s girlfriend’s behavior, “I am wondering about her relationship with the sister. Some people can have an odd one with their partner’s siblings. As for OP: NTA and don’t apologize. Whether intentional or not, your GF could have jeopardized your sister’s business. You have reiterated this in plain English multiple times. Don’t apologize – not even for your wording, tone, etc. You said she has never had issues with weight, and you made it clear that was not the issue. I’m still not well educated on the subject, but she may have used gaslighting here as she’s trying to make you think you did something you did not do (fat-shaming). So don’t apologize as the way your sister makes a living is on the line here, do the opposite and have this reaction EVERY TIME your gf does this.”
What should be the way forward for this, especially because OP’s girlfriend could jeopardize his sister’s business?
This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.
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