OP has a 22-year-old daughter. She’s in college and lives on campus. He had agreed to help her make car payments since she was in school. But recently, he’s done an about-face.
What Made Him Change His Mind?
A young man OP works with tells him his daughter strips at a club about 40 minutes from where they live. OP confronts her about it. Surprisingly, OP’s daughter was honest enough to admit that she’s a stripper, but only in the meantime because she needs the money and doesn’t plan to do it after she graduates.
OP isn’t having it and tells her instead of being a stripper, she could work at McDonald’s. He emphasized that it was much better than using her body for money. They got into an argument, and he insisted that she quit stripping and get a decent job. OP’s daughter has refused, arguing that stripping is easy money.
Easy Money Should Payoff the Car
Since his daughter considers stripping to be an easy way to make money, OP argued that perhaps she could figure out how to pay her car loan with it. He concludes that it’s pointless to continue to pay off her car loan. Naturally, his daughter is upset and expresses how unfair her dad is being with his decision.
She admits that she doesn’t make enough money to shoulder that responsibility. She goes on to tell her dad’s wife about everything that happened and how he won’t pay for her car anymore. While his wife is upset by her job of choice, she is on her side about his decision being unfair. Even so, OP isn’t budging. He feels like, “My money! My decision! I call the shots.” For him, it’s perfectly fair.
She’s Doing What She Has To Do
What people term “decent” jobs is mostly subjective. Redditors who view things from this perspective demonstrate why OP’s biases are unjustified. Although OP may frown upon it, many users agree that being a stripper makes much more money than working at McDonald’s for fewer hours. It is also a good choice if she wants to avoid exhausting herself and balance employment, school, and social life at once.
To make the same amount of money she does now, she would need to put in three to five times as much time at a considerably more physically taxing profession. Owing to this analysis, a user claims that OP telling her to stop the job is like requesting that she be demoted. It’s also absurd that he’s changing the rules when his assistance in covering her auto payments wasn’t dependent on her holding a particular job or refraining from holding a particular job.
Strangely, it seems safer to be a stripper to avoid harassment from male folks. Knowledge of this should ease OP’s mind, knowing that his daughter is safer in a strip club than in a retail outlet. Drawing from her experience, one user who has made money working in food service for years shares that she’s lost count of how many times she’s been solicited or sometimes assaulted by guests and how often management shrugs their shoulders and walks away.
As opposed to most ‘adult’ jobs that have security on the ground to promptly address any incidences of harassment. According to another user, “There’s still an expectation in retail that you politely endure and/or pander to the flirting because if you tell them you’re not interested and to screw off then you’ll get dinged for having a bad survey or being rude to guests.”
Refusing to pay off her car loan may not be the best way to make his daughter stop being a stripper. Some Redditors suggest that OP lacks good persuasive skills. Even worse, he’s driving a wedge between himself and his daughter, leading her down a dangerous path. If OP has a problem with her working, he can compensate her at her current rate of pay.
Redditors urge him to show maturity and compassion by devising a way to help her transition towards paying for something he previously pledged to pay for if he decides he no longer wants to assist her.
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