Everyone has the things that make them happy. Other people may not understand it, but they must respect it and try not to make others feel bad about what brings them joy, especially when joy is rare.
That aside, pregnancy is a time filled with a thousand different emotions in a woman’s life. Women love to document their journey, and one of the popular ways they do it is through photographs.
But in this story, I doubt OP understands that. If he did, he wouldn’t have a problem with his wife taking photos of her pregnant belly.
OP’s wife is currently pregnant. And according to him, she’s been really “marketing” it on her Instagram. And why shouldn’t she? It’s a thing of joy.
Almost every post she makes features her showing off her belly, and he’s fed up with it. He has had to work a lot more lately. Sometimes, he’s away for a considerable part of the week. He used to feel happy checking her Instagram stories to see what she was up to or doing with their girls. That’s a cute way to keep up with the family. He must have gotten so used to the routine that he forgot it was her account.
Now, he thinks it’s just the same boring content she keeps posting, and even her friends are getting fed up with it. She recently posted a picture of herself smiling. One of her friends commented, “You look lovely, glad it’s not another belly pic,” which I think is a backhanded comment.
Tone It Down
He talked to her about the belly pictures and told her he would prefer if she could tone down with the photos of her belly. In his opinion, everyone already knows she’s pregnant. He would like it if she returned to posting the content she used to before her pregnancy.
There are only a few people who enjoy being told what to do. As you would expect, it led to an argument. She said it was her personal Instagram and told him, “Don’t watch if you don’t like it,” and “he doesn’t understand what it feels like.” And how could he? Only one pregnant person can fully comprehend the joys, and other emotions pregnancy brings.
His comments offended her deeply, and she is hardly talking to him now.
He understands she is very excited about being pregnant (but does he?), and she is probably bored because she’s currently out of work. Still, he felt the need to tell her to tone it down. But because of how she reacted, he’s wondering if he made the wrong choice.
What People Think
Most people think that OP was wrong. “Her Instagram, her photos,” they say, but a few people don’t think it’s such a black-and-white situation.
For instance, one person weighs the case on both sides:
“It’s one of those things that I don’t think he was an AH if he was trying to gently help save her embarrassment by broaching the subject.
If she’s been oversharing to the point her friends are commenting, they’re glad it’s not another baby pic, she may be obliviously overdoing it. Sometimes I think it’s the right move for a partner or friend to try to help by gently pointing out that someone’s actions may be a bit much.
However, if he continues to push now that the wife has expressed that she doesn’t care and still wants to keep doing it, despite how others may be perceiving it, then OP would be TA.”
Petty and Silly
Another thinks it’s “petty and silly” to control what she posts:
“He wants her to change what makes her happy because he thinks it’s too much and boring. Let the woman do what she wants. It’s harmless and says more about the people being bothered by it than her.
Criticizing what a pregnant woman posts on social media seems so petty and silly.”
At the end of the day, OP might need to learn to get comfortable with it. Even if he finds it embarrassing, pregnancy is a big time for a woman. The last thing she wants to hear is how she’s “overdoing” it. Do you think OP is right? Was his wife wrong to get offended?
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