My Daughter’s Mother Has Labeled Me as a ‘Disneyland Dad’ Because I Take My Daughter Out To Do Fun Activities

A Reddit user shared a story about how his daughter’s mother labeled him a “Disneyland dad” because he was only interested in taking their daughter out to do fun things.

Disneyland Dad

The OP is a 26 year-old-man who split with his girlfriend of 3 years weeks before she discovered she was pregnant. He says he told her he would support whatever decision she made. She decided to keep the child. The OP has a minimum-wage job, but he pays child support.

According to him, the daughter’s mother is too strict with parenting and she thinks he does not do enough. When the daughter was born, the OP stayed over until she started sleeping through the night. He then went back to the house he shared with others.

The daughter’s mother complains that the OP is present in their life only as a ‘fun’ dad. He comes to the house, picks up the daughter, and goes with her to the beach to play while her mother stays at home.

She says the OP is not committed since he does not want to spend consistent hours and occasional days with the child. The OP says that is impossible since he has different plans, and job shifts might crop up at any time.

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Mediation by family members has not been fruitful. The mother threatens to sue for full custody if the OP cannot stick to a consistent plan.

The OP wants to know whether he is doing something wrong and whether the mother of his daughter is feeling entitled. Should he change his parenting strategy, considering he also has to work to support them?

Before we lean on to what the masses thought about the situation, it emerged that the child in question was an infant aged six months.

The OP also said (in another thread) that he couldn’t commit to staying with his daughter because he wanted to have his social life back over the weekend.

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The Masses Weigh In

The Reddit Community quickly weighed in on the story, and the majority blamed the OP for causing the rift in his family.

One of them argued that the OP was exercising power play over his daughter’s mother, “Oh, it’s 100% a power play. If he doesn’t commit and picks times at the last minute, he knows she’s stuck at home and can’t do anything.”

This was supported by another user who claimed that it may not all be as glossy as the OP wants people to believe, “He wants to have all the fun moments without the work, too bad for him because even those picture-perfect moments are preceded by meltdowns and potty accidents.”

The Kid Is Just an Infant

One user disputed OP’s claim that he spent hours playing with his daughter at the beach after more details about the child being an infant came to light, “He’s got to be lying, right? I mean he’s taking an infant to hang out in the playground for hours? An infant who, as you say, can’t even hold their head up yet? Delusional!”

The Mother Should Sue for Full Custody

According to several users, the mother should have full custody of the baby because the OP does not seem to want to commit to a custodial arrangement.

One said, “He doesn’t want a formal custody agreement because he just wants to pop up at his ex’s house whenever he feels like…. while he spends his life doing whatever he wants, whenever he wants.”

Another supported this statement saying, “If your child is not a priority then just let her have full custody. Your child deserves a stable life. It’s not about you anymore.”

He Will Not Change

“The worst part about this man is that he will not change at all. He will continue to be a Disneyland dad until he isn’t anymore. Then his child will realize what a huge disappointment he is. Then he’ll complain on social media about how his child doesn’t pay any attention to him,” said one user.

One user argued that the OP had made up his mind that taking care of his kid was a woman’s work, “Pretty sure this guy thinks the actual duty of taking care of your kids is “woman’s work” that he didn’t “sign” up for because his ex knew she would be a “single mom,” forgetting that saying that implies he is a deadbeat.”

The OP Led the Mother On

The OP promised to buy a house and get another baby in the future. According to one user, this showed that he may have led her to believe that he wanted them in his life, “He was the one who told her he wanted to buy a house and have another baby and then was shocked when she thought that meant he wanted them to get back together.”

There Is No Issue With Spending a Few Hours With One’s Child

One user supported the OP saying he/she did not see any issue with the OP wanting to spend several hours with his child; everything else kept constant, “Personally, I have no issues with one parent picking up the child for a few hours and going to do something fun.”

What would you have advised the OP to do to rectify his situation?

Read the original post here.

This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.

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Hi! I am a millennial mom with a passion for personal finance. I have always been “into” personal finance but got inspired to start my blog after a period of extended unemployment. That experience really changed the way I viewed my relationship with money and the importance of accessible personal finance education.